Malice in Blunderland

After reading this brilliant publication I needed to share it with CairnsNews readers.

Image from

By Grumpy Geezer

’The question is,’ said Alice, ‘whether you can make words mean so many different things.’

In a local take on a post-truth Trumpian world of alternative facts Smirko Morrison’s BS centrifuge has been revved up to desperation level on the spin cycle. Election timing options have become constrained by circumstances beyond the limited capacities of our prevaricator-in-chief and Tory polling numbers have taken a promising downward trajectory.

Smirko’s omnifiascos have accumulated into an Abbottesque fustering of clucks and the panic is starting to show but you’ve gotta admire his chutzpah:

Framing an anti-corruption body as the bad guys is Orange Donnie-level gaslighting. The capo dei capi of the most corrupt federal government in our history is cashing in on the martydom of St Gladys d’Berejiklian, seeing a chance to sell his omertà as a virtue. Gladdy, his “very good friend“*, had been persecuted by ICAC, she was a victim – he would not be distracted from his good works by such unjust scrutiny.

*not his very good friend

Ever the opportunist who trades on punching down Smirko shortly thereafter took a populist dig at social media with some performative outrage at anonymous trolls, some of whom besmirch the reputations of the alleged rapists, the sex pests and stalkers, the sousers and spivs whose presence he relies upon to stay in power.

Smirko’s been selling farts as rainbows since his brief gig as a child actor. In spruiking NSW’s rampant Delta outbreak as the gold standard that is leading the way out of the pandemic he’s betting the house that the born-every-minute schmucks are as thick as the curtains in a ground floor bordello and that they outnumber those voters with either a conscience or a functioning cerebrum. The problem is that he may be right – the gushing over St Gladys has no doubt chuffed the PMO’s Goebbels-Riefenstahlists and their RWNJ pamphleteer chums from the Murdoch sewers.

Image: Charles Dodgson, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland

Gladdy was down not just on Daryl Maguire but also with the BAU Tory grift; rortin’ and rootin’ – you’re darn tootin’ (if the Libs wanna use that as a slogan there’s gonna be a small fee). Dirty Dazza was upbeat, feeling Glad all over 😎 with the scheming for detouring some lazy millions down Wagga Wagga way but so many sympathetic Aussie mums undermined the March4Justice sisterhood by allowing that Gladys, a senior politician blooded in the fight club of Tory politics, had no agency over her own decisions because of a dud boyfriend. FFS! Nice way to feed the ‘women are too emotional’ self-fellating misogynist set.

Let us not forget St Gladys’s direction of bushfire relief funds to Tory electorates and donors while ignoring badly affected Labor-held LGAs. Let us not forget either the shredding of the paperwork after ICAC revelations of the rorted Stronger Communities slush fund and Gladys’s “too bad, so sad” response. Her new squeeze is a senior counsel familiar with the workings of ICAC yet Gladys threw in the towel at the prospect of further please explains. Do ya think she may know what’s coming? Joan of Arc my pink, wrinkled backside! The Canberra Tories’ delight that the Gladys experience was validating their normalisation of corruption may have a short shelf life if Gladdy is proven to be a baddy.

That gaunt apparition now haunting the federal backbenches, looking less a Tory blue-blood Prime Minister-in-waiting than a corpse disinterred from a shallow bush grave is Christian Blue Balls Porter. It was Blue Balls who was initially tasked with drafting an Avoiding Answerability bill in the time he could spare between persecuting whistleblowers in secret trials and trawling for knee-tremblers in the bars of Manuka and Kingston. Nothing says integrity like a bloke who blames his 2 year old for wiping his iPhone, who refuses any testing of his vociferously professed innocence of rape allegations and who sits on a $1M legal fund the donors of which he will not reveal.

That Shroedinger integrity bill is now in the hands of a woman who was passed over for the job of North Korean news reader lady because she was too shrill. Michaelia has form – refusing an interview with the AFP over a choreographed police raid on a union. Her credentials as Smirko’s AG are impeccable.

Smirko also wants us to overlook that his 2IC is a babbler of incoherent hayseed homilies that pass for insights in whatever addled processes pass for his remaining brain function. Barmy Barnaby did what Barmy does – saying the quiet bit out loud by complaining that he couldn’t do his thing if he was to be held to account.

It would be useful if a Barnaby colour chart could be produced to warn observers of his current state: embarrassed pink, fully munted magenta, blotto burgundy, hungover vermillion, priapic purple or befuddled violet. There’s one thing to be said in Barnaby’s defence though – his pub tests always have the biggest sample size.

I am not crazy; my reality is just different from yours.” The Cheshire Cat, Alice in Wonderland.

Barmy is as miffed at social media as Smirko:

From my own personal experience of recent times, you have got to get to a point where you say enough is enough” said Barmy with a straight albeit florid face.

Sure, social media has its virtues and its values and enables us to connect with people in ways we’ve never had before, but those weapons can also be used by the evil one and we need to call that out.” Scott Morrison, Australian Christian Churches conference March 2021.

Image from Twitter Smirko may claim to see the work of Beelzebub, perhaps in the user comments posted to his own social media calling him a duplicitous turd. He hates that he has little control over it but he fears an integrity commission. His ranting about social media is one of his go-to ‘look, squirrel’ distractions but nothing shouts guilty more loudly than a politician dodging anti-corruption scrutiny. He wants us to forget his pattern of failure but he is desperate to escape accountability for rampant corruption. A perp walk is not good look for post-politics sinecures even in the boardrooms and ambassadorships of the Tory ecosystem.

The connection between integrity commissions and social media is the Lying Nasty Parties’ dislike of both because they hold the sleazy bastards to account and call out the f**k ups being sold as triumphs when the mainstream media is largely complicit. The Tories will frame any legislation as being targeted at the nasty trolls but the net will be wide. Scrutiny, truth and dissent are their true targets and bullying and harassment is a practice they would prefer to monopolise.


About Editor, cairnsnews

One of the few patriots left who understands the system and how it has been totally subverted under every citizen's nose. If we can help to turn it around we will, otherwise our children will have nothing. Our investigations show there is no 'government' of the people for the people of Australia. The removal of the Crown from Australian Parliaments, followed by the incorporation of Parliaments aided by the Australia Act 1987 has left us with corporate government with policies not laws, that apply only to members of political parties and the public service. There is no law, other than the Common Law. This fact will be borne out in the near future as numerous legal challenges in place now, come to a head soon.

Posted on October 10, 2021, in corruption, General, New World Order, People Power, Scott Morrison and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.

  1. Read this and learn all about how they play with words to manipulate and contort their words as it suits.
    Death Sentence: The Decay of Public Language
    Book by Don Watson

    Click to access week12_watson_publiclanguage.pdf


  2. He has – and on Absent-Sneezy, you seem to be wearing a certain political faithful hat how bloody sad open your mind and enjoy great Aussie humour. Guess we can count on you keeping the duopoly dictators afloat on polling day .. ED2


  3. The three bi-elections will show the trend and if you are right David I am out of here, You can only bang your head against a wall for so long I started in 2000 trying to muster the sheeple. I have plan B ready which involves I, Me and MYSELF …ED2


  4. Just a quote, which fit 100% with the above ..
    Quote by Karl Rove: “We’re an empire now, and when we act, we create…”. “We’re an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you’re studying that reality — judiciously, as you will — we’ll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that’s how things will sort out.


  5. No doubt Slomo Morrison has only one thing going for him, Labour’s “I loved an ice cream that didn’t exist” Albanese. Between the two of them they’ll garner enough votes from the thinking sheeple to provide us with more of the same and less of what our country needs.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Will this Geezer do an equally scathing deep-dive on Dirty Dan and Petty Tyrant Palaszczuk? Not holding my breath.


  7. Punch magazine was born of such repartee, and it’s interesting how “on the ball” Lewis Carroll was, so many years ago, lumping “Shoes and ships and sealing wax, and cabbages and kings” all togeather, giving each the same value.


  8. YEP you,ve got it correct on BONKIN BARNABY how dare we bring up the sale of cubby station to the chinese when it was ALLEDGED that an Aussie consortium was WILLING to pay more BUT was sidelined ,AS for the hillsong hillbilly it appears he,s getting his old gang back toghether OP<S i mean front bench who also happen to be Attatched to the MURRY DARLING WATER RIPPOFF , having reinstated good ole angus , THEY must think the SANE NOT JABBED voters are as dumb as the sheeple AS DOG SHIT.


  9. We will be featuring more from Grumpy Geezer .. ED2


  10. you have outdone yourself GGezer !!!!!!!!!!! absolutely brilliant X TWO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  11. Great talent and political knowledge; a Larry Pickering of text.
    Cairns News should make Grumpy a regular contributor in a time when we need this type of humour to calm the Political circus drama.


  12. Celebrate freedom day by acknowledging each other with a big 4th Reich full arn salute ..ED2


  13. Tomorrow is FREEDOM DAY in Sydney… Whoop-de-doo…
    Sydney-siders are encouraged to enjoy their New Freedoms…
    Freedon to wear a face mask everywhere…
    Freedom to check-in at every store etc entered… And…
    These Freedoms Are Compulsory… Enjoy !


  14. Thx Lloyd. I just love reading Cairns News for the wonderful expressions and language used. Long live this type of eloquence!

    sent from

    Murray Clark +64212789759



  15. AS an investigator of non-political biased the content is entertaining as well as factual. I do understand catching the attention of politically biased readers who comment accordingly ..ED2


  16. Wow! Political bias, anybody? He gave away his far-left leanings from the start in his depiction of Trump (who has nothing at all to do with this, but hey, a bit of red meat for the slavering lefties)- the Truth is that BOTH sides of Parliament are as corrupt and venal as each other and should be thrown in jail and a fresh start made.(Just saying)


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