Lars Lokke Rasmussen, from Denmark’s “Moderates” party, is not even a Green, but thinks, like Bill Gates, that cows are evil polluters of the planet.

By MICHAEL SLOVANOS

THE year 2030, as we have mentioned previously, is the year that pea-brained politicians, boof-headed bureaucrats, asinine academics, and moronic media types all think will usher in a glorious new age when fairy godmothers appear from heaven, sprinkling magic eco-dust on pristine pastures inhabited by prancing pink ponies and green unicorns.

Oh yes, 2030 really is the year when every wonderful zero-carbon thing will happen. 2030 is why we have Agenda 2030. Just ask your federal, state and local Environment Departments, or the politicians on their strings. And folks, this is not just an Australian pipe dream, it’s global reality! Our technocratic masters at the World Economic Forum will confirm this too!

Take for instance the lovely little EU colony of Denmark, who will launch what they claim is the world’s first carbon tax on livestock, charging dairy farmers about $96 per cow beginning in 2030 to reduce those evil, nasty, toxic methane emissions that are literally choking our planet and killing us on a daily basis.

Now the Kiwis will dispute that Danish claim, given that the WEF’s wonder woman Jacinda “Jackboots” Ardern proposed a carbon tax on livestock back in 2022. It caused such an outcry from unenlightened farm folk that their industry guardians at Beef + Lamb New Zealand came up with a compromise – a lovely “levy” starting in 2025 that would have the effect of excluding sheep and cattle from an emissions trading scheme.

Who would have thought? So instead of Kiwi livestock farmers being kicked in the teeth with a 2030 carbon tax, they would be kicked in the teeth with a 2025 livestock levy. Oh boy, those industry bureaucrats know how to do stuff!

The incredibly brave Andrew Morrison, chairman of Beef + Lamb New Zealand, said that the scheme was “essential for maintaining social license”. “This is our sector’s plan to manage emissions on-farm in a practical and fair way while keeping agriculture out of an emissions trading scheme,” he said.

And after all, added Morrison, “doing nothing is not an option. Our consumers are asking for action and so are our communities.” Oh yes, we’re sure we saw tens of thousands of Kiwis out on the streets with pitchforks an placards demanding that their political class save them from the killer climate!

OK, so Denmark’s coming climate tax on cows, pigs and sheep might not be an original idea, but by golly, Lars Lokke Rasmussen, Denmark’s Minister of Foreign Affairs and leader of the Moderates party, knows it is a wonderful idea because it aligns with EU environment rules, and therefore it must be!

The media faithfully reports that “the move” seeks to help the European country “meet its climate goals” by addressing the largest source of emissions in Denmark, agriculture! Denmark exports a lot of pork and dairy products and now realises that “these economic incentives help keep emissions high”.

Oh yes, why would you want something called “profitable trade in foodstuffs” when it keeps emissions high? We all know that taxing the hell out of that food for the sake of cutting emissions is the noble calling of all in this new age of green enlightenment!

And how dare you complain about expensive red meat when perfectly sustainable and inexpensive protein alternatives are available from sustainably harvested and processed insects.

Meanwhile European media was sharp enough to report that while “farmers are disturbed and fear the financial trouble will hurt their livelihoods” and “protests were expected”, they also noted that the government plans to spend billions in environmental projects, which of course will make the farmers all happy once more.

Those Danish farmers will of course be utterly ashamed to know, as reported by Statistic Denmark, that a “normal Danish cow produces six metric tons (6.6 US tons) of carbon emissions each year, and as of June 30, 2022, 1,484,377 cows existed in the Scandinavian country” clearly raising the threat of enveloping the entire Danish peninsula under millions of tonnes of toxic gas.

And yes, livestock’s days a numbered when you understand how green food technology is advancing in leaps and bounds, such as the Californian company owned by Bill Gates that has made “butter” from CO2 oxygen and hydrogen.

What can we say except “wow” Bill! And you did it before 2030! Actually Billy Boy, we seriously suggest you just do with your “butter” what we also suggest your other climate clown colleagues do with every other “environmental innovation”, and jam them all right up your rear ends until reality dawns upon your poor shriveled minds.

Aussie farmers fighting for their existence might consider joining up with their Kiwi comrades at The Methane Accord, who are demanding that “all policy on ruminant methane emissions must be based on current science.”

“We reject the GWP100 standard for measuring methane as outdated and unscientific and accept the IPCC’s AR6 Report making clear that new science states ruminant methane’s warming ability is exaggerated by 300 to 400%,” the group states.

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